It all started when I read a quote, it was so simple yet it hit me so profoundly and changed my life forever. That quote read…. 

 

Life is short, everyone deserves to be happy. 

 

My eyes immediately filled with tears and body felt heavy and weighed down with an overwhelming sense of sadness. 

 

I was the third generation of wives (from my husbands side) receiving daily acts of verbal, explosive violence that occasionally also ended with broken furniture, holes in the walls or reckless driving. 

 

This type of behavior is as common to his family as the cold. I was in counseling at the time and there was one session in particular that change my life forever.  I learned 

 

about the role modeling I was passing down to my children and what kind of impact it was currently having on their life, and what they would carry onto their future mate. 

 

Tears came rushing to my eyes again and I made the decision right then to remove myself and my children from this relationship. I told him he needed to move out by the weekend, when asked why I said it was because we were fucked up role models. 

 

I was in this relationship for two decades and now I’m feeling powerless, hiding bouts of depression from children and the community and definitely not believing in love.

 

I was scared, scarred, suffered from ptsd, looked at my children and knew they were suffering as well from witnessing and being on the receiving end of the constant

mind fuck, violent abuse.  

 

Where do I begin and where am I going to get the strength to make the changes I know my kids and I deserve. 

 

I was constantly told to “love yourself,”and “give yourself some self love.” I had no idea what that meant. Raising children is so selfless, I gave them all my love, attention and all that I had to provide a home with as much normalcy as possible. 

So, here I am in this place, this place of feeling alone, Point A needing to go to Point B discovering what self love is. 

 

Over time I realized my journey was to not only know what self love was, but to help guide you back to your power and connection with yourself. 

 

You’ll find lots of information from my blog, throughout the website and or follow along on Instagram!

Subscribe to hear about upcoming workshops and retreats.

Find Stand Up Paddle Girl on Pinterest for more inspiration and recipes for a healthy holistic life!

 

And see you on, in or by the water!